Stomach Butterfly Syndrome.

The world's most powerful leaders have it...
Many doubtful romeos have died unnoticed because of it...
Osama probably missed the loo and had to mollify the nature calling at some deserted oasis on the Afghanistan-Pakistan border because of it....
And our Pete has it...

The Stomach Butterfly Syndrome.

While at some juncture, I had its fangs digging for my mind. I was taken aback, yet unable to qualm my consternation. With a jolted calm, the oxymorons were vivid and stupefying. It was like a you have wetted your pants, having really weak penile muscles and you have to take the stage. Yes, that kind of a giddy tangibility that was infesting me. All the while, I was unwary of what was happening. And made a note of this rarity.

I will try my best to post a cogent analysis of the pros and cons of this phenomenon. But any differences will only help to analyze this syndrome further. So people, your difference of opinions and comprehensives are required...

The Stomach Butterfly Syndrome, or the SBS, is mainly reported to infect someone in particularly demanding or embarassing situations, where you are supposed to accomplish a certain task, or achieve or placate certain anomalies in any situations, particularly parties and gatherings. The latter however may not be that common but such scenarios are often found effective. The name is derived from a ticklish felt inside the abdomen which is compared to the wafted wind-strokes of a butterfly, due to the sprighty pressure. Yet, its no confimed acknowledgement from the subject, if he or she is rather suffering from a constipation, the Pizza at midnight, did the trick or what? This syndrome is more of a psychological phenomenon, but severe effects are known to materialize into puke or a discreet fart. Otherwise, in mild presence it causes light malaise or even giggles. Also, it is remarked by a bouyant senstivity, like your bottoms are in the air, the sensation before taking a skydive. Skydiving, by the way, is the most unforgiving of all professions, as it does'nt give you a second chance.

Anyways. In such a state the subject is either in a delusional state, which is marked by the uncorrigated reaction to his or her surroundings, or even unsolicited attention on elements in the vicinity, which is inturn a helplessly covert attempt to concentrate on something else, but it all is brought about in the most unsual way. In such a condition the subject is vulnerable, and is the perfect prey for pranks and loans, even the cellphone. The subject's response to any question may be in the affirmative of the view of the questioner, which is immensely beneficial if you are a politician or worse a drunkard. Such people can be advantageously used to ones benefits, as drastically as inheritance of your ancestral properties. A horrified husband can probably make his horrifying wife commit suicide, like taking her delirious self on a walk on the terrace and tell her, "Honey! you go on straight, and look at the beautiful and soothing moon and the stars, while I'll go and fetch some books on Industrial Economics(the Hell she cares!) and be right back!" What she would not realize is that you will join her somewhere after 10 other 'broken' relationships and a life or cuban cigars and the retreats of Candy and Barbara.

So it concludes the static and the mind numbing measures of this common but deadly syndrome almost chimeric to one's sanitites.

As far as the possibilities of its origin lie, its evocation is triggered by any of the yet discovered predicaments:

1) Overt curiosity. A harrowing sense of doing something, yet be too cautious about the way to go about doing it. There is a block of conscience and the motor-neuron mesh of the nervous system, where too much cholesterol or chocolates make them heavy and too sweet to function. So, a carnivore is more prone to have a homicidal suicide, if you are a female. Probably, the cats have more broken homes and squandered dealings than giraffes and chimps.

2) Decisive moments, a tense and panicking situation, like a virgin about to consummate. Something of great epochality and effect, something even remotely capable of causing alterations, a haggard "now ex"-boyfriend finding a way out of the 'clutches' of that b****, inturn submitting to this syndrome. Hitherto, about 14,259 cases have been reported where an instance has given rise to another case either in the same individual or someone close, often partners, irrespective of sex, or some celebrity on Prabhu Chawla's show, or yet one minister watching another on T.V. doing his 'usual' business, this time on a spy-cam!

3) Envy. This tactility is often undetected and compromised for something more moral like nervousness etc. In fact, about 80% of the cases have been reported to have a strong logical relation with some invidious factors, present at that point of time around the subject. When the subject's desires, for which he/she is unable to do justice to, is comprehended and carried out in a more splendid manner, or so it seems to the subject, who is particularly pessimistic within this period, there is an acute stress developed and is usually reflected by cold sweat, and a wavering speech pattern. At this time, the subject is furtively glancing at the object of his envy or is trying to liaise with him, or to deviate or even dissuade him away from his deeds. Extreme cases may find the subject talking with a vehemence, which is often ineffectual or chastising to the subject himself/herself. Our female species is specifically targeted by this form of the aspect. It can be triggered particularly at jewellery shops and on kitty parties, which serve all the purpose or the lack of it - 'to meet'.

On an ending note, I still don't know what was inhabiting me out of these three causes. But am still intrigued by the deftness with which it takes down its victim. Its withdrawal symptoms are still strong as I am forced to make up all these statistics at this time of the day, my goddamned professional life may go for a toss. To disrupt any doubtful streaming of thoughts on the screen, I shall propose that 67.8...no erm...67.97% of the statistics were corroborated before their mention to put forth my findings on this virtually abeyant topic.




And yes, even this time, it was a confounded member of the opposite sex, and the factor was probably the third one... Yes I know, I am hopeless. Go put up a hoarding on that tomorrow, I wont even resent to myself on myself.